My Guts Have Shit For Brains

So there it is – as the images show, I’ve failed as a Mystic Meg like pundit, however I feel no sense of remorse for my ability as a football fan, in fact quite the opposite.

If I had been right, or even if any of friends had been on the money, it would have been a dull and predictable affair similar to a Michael Bay film, but without the delights of Megan Fox in cut-off jeans.

Instead we were once again treated to a season of twists and turns the like of which keep us coming back every week.

Pre-season form, exciting summer signings and a lifetime of watching football seemingly count for nothing when it comes to predicting how things will end up come the end of the season.

All the way back in August last year I thought I’d nailed it when I confidently scribbled down my guesses.

I felt I had sound reasoning to back-up my decisions, like the fact that Chelsea couldn’t possibly win the league with Ancelotti in his first season in English football, as that is reserved for the Special One.

Also, Burnley and Wolves couldn’t possible stay up as I knew very little about them – so they must be crap. At least I was half right.

Along with Burnley, Hull was my only other correctly guessed answer, although if I had followed my instincts and not bowed to pressure from the consistency of the big four monopoly, then I would also be able to claim kudos for correctly predicting that Spurs would finish fourth, but my guts told me it wouldn’t happen.

It turns out though that my guts have shit for brains, although I still can’t picture Del Boy Redknapp managing a side in a Champions League match – the pieces in my mind just don’t seem to fit, but I’m looking forward to seeing it all the same.

At the top it was unclear who was going to win it up until the last few games and there was even a point in the season where United and Chelsea teased Arsenal with the hope of winning the title, before they ultimately settled for third and another trophyless season.

Further down the table Liverpool’s recreation of their mid-1990s side that enjoyed obscurity from any form of success was frighteningly accurate as much as it was unexpected, but it did allow a new face into the top four.

Not to be out done, the bottom half waded in with its fair share of talking points – notably Wigan’s inability to decide whether or not they’re a good side (3-1 v Chelsea) or an atrocious bunch of amateurs (1-9 v Spurs; 0-8 v Chelsea).

Portsmouth’s financial fuck-ups were revealed this season in all their glory and as a result they were docked ten points for entering administration, which effectively sent them down, despite their attempt to break the Guinness World Record for having the most owners in one season.

Regardless of this Pompey ended the season strongly, only losing twice in the last six league games and they even managed a trip to Wembley for the FA Cup Final.

Who would have thought it back in August that a team would enter administration, as well as being relegated and reach the Cup Final? Only in the Premier League.

Posted By Dan Mobbs - Thursday May 20, 2010.
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